JotD / QotD Ελληνική Λίστα Ανεκδότων (JotD)


Θέμα: What SHE really means



(nil): Spiliotopoulos Georgios (georgesp(@)ceid.upatras.gr)
Ημερομηνία: Τετ 18 Ιούν 1997 - 23:22:47 EEST

At long last... The Men's Guide to what a woman really means when she says
something. Pay close attention (there might be a quiz later).<p>
--------------------------------------------------------------

You want = You want

We need = I want

It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now.

Do what you want = You'll pay for this later.

We need to talk = I need to complain

Sure... go ahead = I don't want you to.

I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron!

You're ... so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot.

You're certainly attentive tonight. = Is sex all you ever think about?

I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting! = I'm on my period.

Be romantic, turn out the lights. = I have flabby thighs.

This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house.

I want new curtains = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper.....

I need wedding shoes = the other 40 pairs are the wrong shade of white.

Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there!

I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep.

Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive.

How much do you love me? = I did something today you're really not going
to like.

I'll be ready in a minute. = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on
T.V.

Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful.

You have to learn to communicate. = Just agree with me.

Are you listening to me!? = [Too late, you're dead.]

Yes = No

No = No

Maybe = No

I'm sorry. = You'll be sorry.

Do you like this recipe? = It's easy to fix, so you'd better get used to
it.

Was that the baby? = Why don't you get out of bed and walk him until he
goes to sleep.

I'm not yelling! = Yes I am yelling because I think this is important.

All we're going to buy is a soap dish = It goes without saying that we're
stopping at the cosmetics department, the shoe department, I need to look
at a few new pocket books, and OMIGOD those pink sheets would look great
in the bedroom and did you bring your checkbook?

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The answer to "What's wrong?"

The same old thing = Nothing
Nothing = Everything
Everything = My PMS is acting up
Nothing, really = It's just that you're such an asshole
I don't want to talk about it = Go away, I'm still building up steam


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