JotD / QotD Ελληνική Λίστα Ανεκδότων (JotD)


Θέμα: Massachusetts Winter



(nil): Kostas Zerfiridis (zerf(@)med.auth.gr)
Ημερομηνία: Παρ 23 Ιαν 1998 - 05:19:04 EET

                        DEAR DIARY
   
  Aug. 12: Moved to our new home in Massachusetts. It is so beautiful
            here. The mountains are so majestic. Can hardly wait to see
            snow covering them.
   
  Oct. 14: Massachusetts is the most beautiful place on earth. The leaves
            are turned all the colors and shades of red and orange. Went
            for a ride through he beautiful mountains and saw some deer.
            They are graceful. Certainly they are the most wonderful
            animals on earth. This must be paradise. I love it here.
   
  Nov. 11: Deer season will start soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to
            kill such a gorgeous creature. Hope it will snow soon. I love
            it here.
   
  Dec. 2: It snowed last night. Woke up to find everything blanketed
            with white. It looks like a postcard. We went outside and
            cleaned the snow off the steps and shoveled the driveway. We
            had a snowball fight (I won), and when the snow-plow came by,
            we had to shovel the driveway again. What a beautiful place.
            I love Massachusetts.
   
  Dec. 12: More snow last night. I love it. The snow-plow did his trick
            again to the driveway. I love it here.
   
  Dec. 19: More snow last night! Couldn't get out of the driveway to get
            to work. I am exhausted from shoveling. Damn snow-plow!
   
  Dec. 22: More of that white shit fell last night, I've got blisters on
            my hands from shoveling. I think the snow-plow hides around
            the curve and waits until I'm done shoveling the driveway.
            Asshole!
   
  Dec. 25: Merry friggen Christmas! More friggen snow. If I ever get my
            hands on the jerk who drives the snow-plow, I swear I'll kill
            him. Don't know why they don't use more salt on the roads to
            melt the damn ice!
   
  Dec. 27: More white shit last night. Been inside for three days except
            for shoveling out the driveway after that friggen snow-plow
            goes through every time. Can't go anywhere, car's stuck in
            the mountain of white shit. The weatherman says to expect
            another 10" of the shit again tonight. Do you know how many
            shovels full of snow 10" is?
   
  Dec. 28: The friggen weatherman was wrong! We got 34" of that white
            shit this time. At this rate it won't melt before the summer.
            The snow-plow got stuck up the road and that jerk came to the
            door and asked to borrow my shovel. After I told him I had
            broken six shovels already shoveling all the shit he pushed
            into the driveway, I broke my last one over his head!
   
  Jan. 4: Finally got out of the house today. Went to the store to get
            food and on the way back a damned deer ran in front of the car
            and I hit it. Did about $3,000 damage to the car. Those
            beasts should be killed. Wish the hunters had killed them
            all last November!
   
  May 3: Took the car to the garage in town. Would you believe the thing
            is rusting out from the damn salt they put all over the roads.
   
  May 10: Moved to Georgia. I can't imagine why anyone in their right
            mind would ever live in that God-forsaken State of
            Massachusetts.

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