JotD / QotD Ελληνική Λίστα Ανεκδότων (JotD)


Θέμα: SIGNS WHEN YOU ARE TOO DRUNK



(nil): Stathis o Asteios (asteios(@)hotmail.com)
Ημερομηνία: Τρι 30 Ιούν 1998 - 08:42:14 EEST

SIGNS THAT YOU ARE TOO DRUNK:
     
     You lose arguments with inanimate objects.
     
     You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the
earth.
     
     Job interfering with your drinking.
     
     Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.
     
     Career won't progress beyond Senator from Massachusetts.
     
     The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.
     
     Sincerely believe alcohol to be the elusive 5th food group.
     
     24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence?? - I think
not!
     
     Two hands and just one mouth... - now THAT'S a drinking
problem!
     
     You can focus better with one eye closed.
     
     The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.
     
     You fall off the floor...
     
     Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.
     
     Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger, screw
dinner!
     
     Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you
     
     At AA meetings you begin: "Hi, my name is... uh..."
     
     Your idea of cutting back is less salt.
     
     You wake up in the bedroom, your underwear is in the bathroom,
you fell
     asleep clothed. - hmm.
     
     The whole bar says 'Hi' when you come in...
     
     You think the Four Basic Food Groups are Caffeine, Nicotine,
Alcohol, and
     [Women or Men].
     
     Every night you're beginning to find your roommate's cat more
and more
     attractive.
     
     Roseanne looks good.
     
     Don't recognize wife unless seen through bottom of glass.
     
     That damned pink elephant followed me home again.
     
     Senators Kennedy and Packwood shake their heads when they walk
past you.
     
     I'm as jober as a sudge.
     
     The shrubbery's drunk from too frequent watering.
     
     You wake up screaming "TORO TORO TORO!" in the middle of the
night.
     
     
     YOU WILL EXPERIENCE GREAT SEX within four days of receiving this
letter,
     provided you send it on. Since the copy must tour the world, you
must
     make
     ten copies and send them to others. This is no joke. Send no
money. Send
     copies to people who need to GET LAID within 96 hours.
     
        You have to send this to at least 1 person or U will be hit
by your
     crush!
     
        If U send this to, 2 people nothing will happen
        If U send this to, 3 people your crush will start talking to
U
        If U send this to, 4 people your crush will ask U to dance
        If U send this to, 5 people your crush will bring U close
when U dance
        If U send this to, 10 people your crush will kiss U while UR
dancing
        If U send this to, 12 people your crush will kiss U
        If U send this to, 15 people your crush will french kiss U
        If U send this to, 30 people your crush and U will fall in
love
     
        Don't be worried if U don't send it to anyone U will just
plain
     die-off,
        plain and simple, HAVE A NICE DAY!!!
     
     
     YOU HAVE BEEN CHOSEN !
     
     Congratulations! You have been chosen to participate in the
LONGEST and
     the
     LUCKIEST chain letter on america on-line! Once read, this letter
must
     IMMEDIATELY (meaning within the hour)
     be sent to 10 people. After you send it, make a wish and it
will come
     true
     in the amount of days, as it is time. For example , if you send
it at
     8:00,
     your wish will come true in 8 days. YOU MAY NOT WAIT FOR A
CERTAIN TIME
     TO
     SEND IT.......REMEMBER, IT MUST BE SENT WITHIN THE HOUR , OR
YOUR WISH
     WILL
     NOT COME TRUE! If you fail to send this letter , bad luck will
be headed
     your way...... THIS CHAIN LETTER WILL BE IN THE GUINESS BOOK OF
WORLD
     RECORDS
     ITH ALLL PARTICIPANTS NAMES IN IT , IF CONTINUED UNTIL THE YEAR
2000! ! !
     ! !
     
               PLEASE CONTINUE IT NOW
     
     
               This is the letter:
     You must send this on in 1 hour of reading this to 10 different
people .
     If
     you do this you will recieve luck in love. The person you are
most
     attracted to will return your feelings. . This is not a
joke!!!!!!!

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