JotD / QotD Ελληνική Λίστα Ανεκδότων (JotD)


Θέμα: Οδηγός επιβίωσης για μεθυσμένους



(nil): Anastasios Papadopoulos (mm97065(@)mail.ntua.gr)
Ημερομηνία: Τρι 02 Οκτ 2001 - 21:55:47 EEST

Χαιρετώ!

Το ανέκδοτο αυτή την φορά μόνο στα αγγλικά γιατί δεν πρόλαβα (=βαριέμαι...)
να το μεταφράσω.Ζητώ συγνώμη από τους φίλους/ες που δεν μπορούν να το
διαβάσουν (υπόσχομαι να το στείλω και στα Ελληνικά...)

>>>>>>>
                DRINKERS FAULT-FINDING GUIDE
                ============================

Symptom : Drinking fails to give satisfaction and taste; shirt front is wet.
Fault : Mouth not open when drinking or glass being applied to wrong
          part of face.
Solution: Buy another pint and practice in front of a mirror. Continue with
          as many pints as necessary until drinking technique is perfect.

Symptom : Drinking fails to give satisfaction and taste; beer unusually pale
          and clear.
Fault : Glass is empty.
Solution: Find someone who will buy you another pint.

Symptom : Feet cold and wet.
Fault : Glass being held at incorrect angle.
Solution: Turn glass so that open end is pointing at ceiling.

Symptom : Feet warm and wet.
Fault : Loss of self-control.
Solution: Go and stand beside nearest dog - After a while complain to its
          owner about its lack of house training.

Symptom : Bar blurred.
Fault : You are looking through the bottom of your empty glass.
Solution: Find someone who will buy you another pint.

Symptom : Bar swaying.
Fault : Air turbulence unusually high -maybe due to darts match in progress.
Solution: Insert broom handle down back of jacket.

Symptom : Bar moving.
Fault : You are being carried out.
Solution: Find out if you are being taken to another bar - if not complain
          loudly that you are being hi-jacked.

Symptom : The opposite wall is covered in ceiling tiles and has a
          flourescent strip across it.
Fault : You have fallen over backwards.
Solution: If glass is still full, and no one is standing on your drinking arm,
          stay put. If not, get someone to lift you up and lash you to the
bar.

Symptom : Everything has gone dim and you have a mouth full of teeth and
          dog-ends.
Fault : You have fallen over forwards.
Solution: Same as for falling over backwards.

Symptom : You have woken up to find your bed cold, hard and wet. You cannot
          see your bedroom walls or ceiling.
Fault : You have spent the night in the gutter.
Solution: Check your watch to see if its opening time - if not treat yourself
          to a lie in.

Symptom : Everything has gone dim.
Fault : The pub is closing.
Solution: PANIC !!!!!!!!!

>>>>>>>

ΥΓ. Παρατηρώ ένα ενδιαφέρον στις "μυστήριες" :-) φωτογραφίες. Στην σελίδα μου
θα βρείτε ΠΟΛΛΕΣ (κάθε μέρα σχεδόν προσθέτω...) και είστε ευπρόσδεκτοι!
Σημ. Η σελίδα είναι χωρίς διαφημιστικά banners (προς αποφυγή παρεξηγήσεων...)

-- 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
http://users.ntua.gr/mm97065/mypage/
>>>Cascader<<<
Life Sucks...then you die.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
--
Η Έβελυν (το ρομπότ της λίστας) γράφει :
 ... και το λαθος προσπαθει να γινει, για να παρει την
 μπαλα ο Ελληνας παικτης
 Εκφωνητης SPORT  FM
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