(nil): Joanna Katerelos (Joanna_Katerelos(@)bc.sympatico.ca)
Ημερομηνία: Σαβ 13 Ιούν 1998 - 21:30:48 EEST
TRUE STORY AND A GOOD LAUGH...
Cross my heart this happened to someone. This guy lives
in Westchester, NY and goes to school at Ithaca College.
For two years, he has wanted to ask a certain girl (who
is also from Westchester and also goes to Ithaca) out
on a date, but has never had the courage.
Finally, one day over the summer, he sees her at home and
musters up the courage to ask her out. She accepts, and
they make dinner plans for Saturday night. Friday night,
this guy goes out with all of his buddies, and drinks
like Prohibition is coming back. Saturday, he is in such
bad shape that he can't make it through twenty minutes
without either throwing up or using the bathroom.
After several hours of this, he is able to stop throwing
up, but he is still running to the toilet every 20
minutes. He doesn't want to cancel the date, because
he's afraid he won't ever talk to her again. So they
meet in Westchester, and take the train to New York City
(about a 30 minute ride). They get to the restaurant,
and he excuses himself during the appetizers to use the
bathroom. They enjoy the rest of the appetizers without
interruption, but he has to go back again during the
entrees. They decide to get dessert. During dessert, our
hero feels another rumbling, but doesn't want to look
like complete bathroom freak, so he holds it. After a few
minutes, the rumbling subsides, but he still has a bit of
gas stored up. He decides to let this little bit of gas
fly right there at the table (discreetly, of course).
Unfortunately, this little bit of gas came with another
little surprise. "Oh crap," he thinks (and feels).
Instead of running to the bathroom right away, our hero
immediately leans on the arms of his chair to keep from
sitting on this surprise. He maintains this yoga
position for the rest of dessert, trying to figure out
what to do before his tan pants (a) start to smell, or
(b) start to show stains on the outside. He quickly pays
for dinner and they leave the restaurant. Oh, by the
way,he is walking like a cowboy.
On the way to the train station, they pass the Gap. "Do
you mind if I run in and buy a sweater that I was looking
at last week?" he asks. "No problem, I'd like to look
around too," she replies. They go into the Gap.
Fortunately, at the Gap, men's fashions are on the right,
women's fashions are on the left. They split up. Our
hero grabs the first sweater within reach, and hurries
back to the khakis. After selecting a pair that most
closely resemble his current outfit, he brings
both items to the register. His eyes are on his date
(still on the other side of the store) to make sure that
He doesn't even want the sweater, so he says through
clenched teeth (just in case his date can read lips from
40 feet away) "Just the pants." "What?" asks the Gap
girl. "Just the pants!" (Eyes still trained on his
date.) Gap girl: "Oh, OK."
He pays for the pants and walks over to his date, then
they leave the store. They board the train just before
it leaves the station and find two seats in the middle of
the car. Without sitting down, our hero excuses himself
and walks to the bathroom in the back of the car. He
gets to the bathroom as the train departs, and quickly
rips off his pants and boxer shorts. He rolls them into
a ball and throws them out the window. After cleaning
himself off, he opens the Gap bag and pulls out...just
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