JotD / QotD Ελληνική Λίστα Ανεκδότων (JotD)


Θέμα: You've had too much of the '90s when:


(nil): Diakoyanni Emmanuela (e.diacoyanni(@)bull.gr)
Ημερομηνία: Παρ 12 Μαΐ 2000 - 10:23:32 EEST

> >You've had too much of the '90s when:
> >
> > 1. You try to enter your password on the microwave.
> >
> > 2. You haven't played patience with real cards in years.
> >
> > 3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
> >
> > 4. You e-mail your work colleague at the desk next to you to ask "Do
> you
> > fancy going down the pub?" and they reply "Yeah, give me five minutes".
> >
> > 5. You chat several times a day with a stranger from South America, but
> > you haven't spoken to your next door neighbour yet this year.
> >
> > 6. You buy a computer and a week later it is out of date.
> >
> > 7. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that they do
> not
> > have e-mail addresses.
> >
> > 8. You consider Royal Mail painfully slow or call it "snail mail".
> >
> > 9. Your idea of being organised is multiple coloured post-it notes.
> >
> > 10. You hear most of your jokes via email instead of in person.
> >
> > 11. When you go home after a long day at work you still answer the
> phone
> > in a business manner.
> >
> > 12. When you make phone calls from home, you accidentally insert a "9"
> to
> > get an outside line.
> >
> > 13. You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three
> > different companies.
> >
> > 14. Your company welcome sign is attached with Velcro.
> >
> > 15. Your CV is on a diskette in your pocket.
> >
> > 16. You really get excited about a 1.7% pay rise.
> >
> > 17. You learn about your redundancy on the 9 o'clock news.
> >
> > 18. Your biggest loss from a system crash is that you lose all your
> best
> > jokes.
> >
> > 19. Your supervisor doesn't have the ability to do your job.
> >
> > 20. Contractors outnumber permanent staff and are more likely to get
> > long-service awards.
> >
> > 21. Board members salaries are higher than all the Third World
> countries
> > annual budgets combined.
> >
> > 22. It's dark when you drive to and from work, even in the summer.
> >
> > 23. You know exactly how many days you've got left until you retire.
> >
> > 24. Interviewees, despite not having the relevant knowledge or
> > experience, terminate the interview when told of the starting salary.
> >
> > 25. You see a good looking, smart person and you know it must be a
> > visitor.
> >
> > 26. Free food left over from meetings is your staple diet.
> >
> > 27. The work experience person gets a brand-new state-of-the-art laptop
> > with all the features, while you have time to go for lunch while yours
> > powers up.
> >
> > 28. Being sick is defined as you can't walk or you're in hospital.
> >
> > 29 You're already late on the assignment you just got.
> >
> > 30 There's no money in the budget for the five permanent staff your
> > department is short of, but they can afford four full-time management
> > consultants advising your boss's boss on strategy.
> >
> > 31. Your boss's favourite lines are:
> > When you've got a few minutes...
> > Could you fit this in...?
> > ...in your spare time
> > ...when you're freed up
> > I know you're busy but...
> > I have an opportunity for you
> >
> > 32. Holiday is something you roll over to next year.
> >
> > 33. Every week another brown collection envelope comes round because
> > someone you didn't know had started is leaving.
> >
> > 34. You wonder who's going to be left to put into your 'leaving'
> > collection.
> >
> > 35. Your relatives and family describe your job as "works with
> > computers".
> >
> > 36. The only reason you recognise your kids is because their pictures
> are
> > on your desk.
> >
> > 37. You only have makeup for fluorescent lighting.
> >
> > 38. You read this entire list, kept nodding and smiling.
> >
> > 39. As you read this list, you think about forwarding it to your "mates
> > you send jokes to" e-mail group.
> >
> > 40. It crosses your mind that your jokes group may have seen this list
> > already, but you can't be bothered to check so you forward it anyway.
> >
>

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