JotD / QotD Ελληνική Λίστα Ανεκδότων (JotD)


Θέμα: Sheep vs Women



(nil): Spiliotopoulos Georgios (georgesp(@)ceid.upatras.gr)
Ημερομηνία: Τετ 18 Ιούν 1997 - 23:13:46 EEST

 Prokatavolika signomi gia osous/es thixtoun. Diavaste to dixos
prokatalipsi exei plaka...
===================================================== Sheep don't have a gag reflex, or upper teeth
 You can get a better grip on a sheep's ear
 Sheep don't shy away from boots and leather
 Cotton mouth is easier to get rid of than a social disease
 Nuttin' beats mutton
 Sheep won't argue about whose turn it is to go get a towel
 Sheep won't drink your liquor, smoke your weed, snort your coke, and then
tell youthey have to be home early
 Sheep never ask if you're ready to settle down
 Sheep never ask about you former lovers and then get pissed off when you
tell them
 No matter how old or ugly you are, you can always find a
willing ewe
 Sheep are never concerened about their reputation
 Sheep won't tell all their friends about the time you couldn't get it up
 Sheep won't ask if you're gay the first time you can't get it up for the
second time
 Sheep never insist on eating out
 You'll never catch your sheep masturbating to a picture of Mel Gibson
 Sheep don't get suspicious if you have to work late
 Sheep don't smell like tuna fish
 Sheep don't get moody once a month
 You can eat a lamb chop without getting wool stuck in your teeth
 A sheep doesn't expect you to support her for the rest of her life after
one roll in the hay
 A sheep never wears curlers and a mud pack to bed
 A sheep doesn't stop screwing after the honeymoon
 A sheep won't get drunk and throw up in your car
 A sheep won't thinkthat a weekend stay-over entitles her to rearrange
your furniture and put up new curtains
 A sheep won't expect you to pay...and pay...and pay...and pay
 A sheep will never complain about the spittoon in your pickup
 A sheep will never throw out your old copies of Playboy
 A sheep won't care of you keep your fish bait in the refrigerator
 A sheep won't get
even with you by spending your paycheck on new clothes, none of which are
see-through or meant to be worn in the bedroom
 A sheep will never sue you for palimony
 A sheep won't care if you screw her sister
 A sheep won't care if your secretary is better looking than she is
 A sheep will never tell you the ceiling needs to be painted while you're
screwing
 A sheep won't use you razor to shave its legs, or your pocketknife to
open a paint can
 Sheep never have a headache
 A sheep won't give your favorite hunting shirt to Goodwill
 A sheep won't leave wet nylons hanging all over the bathroom
 A sheepwill never ask you to stop on the way home from work and pick up a
box of tampons
 Sheep grow their own fur coats
 A sheep will never leave a vibrator on the living room couch when you're
having friends over to watch football
 Sheep won't cheat on you with your best friend
 A sheep will never ask if you'll still respect her in the morning
 Sheep aren't into talking before or after sex
 A sheep never yells at you for leaving the
lid up
 A sheep won't send you out for batteries for her vibrator
 A sheep doesn't think it's demeaning or kinky to do it doggy style
 A sheep won't mind if you put up mirrors in the bedroom
 Sheep are "ram tough"
 A sheep won't think your cheap and tacky if you: send daisies instead of
long-stemmed red roses, tip less than 20%, wear levis with a hole in the
seat, open beer bottles with your teeth
 Sheep don't mind if you leave the lights on
 Sheep don't mind doing it in the morning
 Sheep don't mind doing it in a pickup truck
 A sheep will never use the excuse that: she just did her nails, it's too
hot, it's too cold, you'll wake the kids, you'll wake the neighbors, she's
too drunk to enjoy it, she's not drunkenough to enjoy it
 A sheep will never leave you for a cucumber


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